Friday, February 1, 2008

Super Sunday 42: The Movie


Hollywood, California - (AP News) Starting Sunday, in theaters everywhere, movie-goes and football fans alike will be able to watch a new film from Oscar Award winning director Steven Spielberg titled "Super Sunday 42: The Movie."

Since the Writers Guild of America is currently on strike, Spielberg has opted to make "SS42: The Movie" a non-scripted full length, feature film with non-SAG actors. Fans will be treated to a live 4 hour movie beginning Sunday at 6:30pm.

This type of movie will be the first of its kind. A unique casting call took place last week and I have the first scoop on what famous celebrities will be playing there look-a-like NFL superstars counterparts.

Cast:

New York Giants:

James Cromwell as Head Coach Tom Coughlin - Cromwell is best known for his Oscar win as Best Supporting Actor in the movie "Babe". For this completely different role, he is preparing by not eating, not sleeping, and abstaining from sex in order to accuratley nail Coughlin's ornery personality.

Trent Dilfer as Punter Jeff Feagles - Who can have less of an important role in the movie, a backup quarterback or a punter?

A Goal Post as DE Michael Strahan - Hopefully the goalpost does not have any kissing scenes in this movie as we all know they don't make great kissers.

Haley Joel Osment as QB Eli Manning - Eli has played turnover free football this postseason yet oddly he will still aslways look 12 years old.



New England Patriots:

Osama Bin Laden as Receiver Randy Moss - Both convienently run from the authorities.

Jesus as QB Tom Brady - Alex, I'll take Things that are Perfect for $200.

Yosemite Sam as OL Logan Mankins - The Patriots have figured out the perfect way to protect Tom Brady against the Giants pass rush: less Yosemite Sam point his six-shooters at them on the way to the QB.

Milli Vinilli (Fab, on the right) as RB Laurence Maroney - "Girl, you know it's true..."

John Wayne Bobbitt as Receiver Wes Welker - JWB will try "carve up" the Giants secondary all game long.

Billy Mays (The Infomercial Guy) as LB Mike Vrabel - Billy Mays has the uncanny ability to sell Oxi-Clean on TV. Mike Vrabel has the uncanny ability to make tackles thus dirtying his uniform and needing Oxi-Clean. But Oxi-Clean is not what these two have in commen as they both sport stylish Al Borland type beards.

Erik Estrada as LB Teddy Brushci - After suffering a stroke in 2005, Officer Francis Poncherello is back patrolling the mean streets of the Patriots defense.

NFL Analysts:

Dan Akroyd as NFL Network Analyst Rich Eisen - Dan Aykrod takes any and every role you give him these days.

Shaun Alexander as NBC Analyst Tiki Barber - Shaun is preparing for this role by creating clicks in the Seahawks lockerrooms as well as telling the media, "Matt Hasselback isn't a leader."

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